Q: I'm ready to get into the dating scene as a single parent, what do I need to know?
Some single parents get back on the dating scene with the hope of getting remarried-and perhaps having more kids some day. The stakes can be higher, and we sometimes find our clients asking themselves, "Would he/she be a good father/mother to my daughter/son?"
Although this question might be valid and very tempting to ask-it's not necessarily fair. Wondering if someone might be a good parent after a first date is jumping too far ahead in the future. It's important to stay in the present. First dates are meant for exploration, so explore the person your with!
Jennifer Wolf, a writer for About.com and a certified parent coach, suggests single parents create a list before they start dating. Got a piece of paper ready?
- In the first column, record the qualities you consider "absolutely necessary" in the person you date.
- In the middle column, write down the qualities you see as "somewhat necessary".
- Finally, make a column listing things that are "not absolutely necessary".
Just remember: thinking about someone's potential as a parent to your child on the first date is not fair to either of you. You will do yourself a favor by getting to know the person for who they are.
